Funny Florida Laws That Are Still on the Books | Lowman Law Firm

Dumb or weird laws. Every state has them (if you’ve been playing bingo for over five hours in North Carolina, or brought your pet flamingo into a barber shop in Alaska, let me see those hands!) So, obviously, I’m not talking about a respectable law that you may just happen to disagree with. I’m talking about completely silly laws that no one follows and no one cares about, but still somehow have a spot in the record books.

This week, I'm dialing down the seriousness, and turning up the funny. Here are my top 12 strange, hilarious, and just plain messed-up, weird Florida laws!

Some of these strange laws don't apply to the whole state. While some of these weird laws in Florida are statewide, others may apply on a county-by-county basis - so what's legal in Miami Beach may not be legal in Tampa or vice-versa.

Crazy Laws in Florida

Avoid becoming the next Florida man headline. Stay in the know about these seemingly random laws in Florida.

1. Singing in public while wearing a bathing suit.

So much for Florida spring break, who wants khaki-pants karaoke?

2. Falling asleep under a salon hood hair dryer.

“I love the smell of nice n’ easy in the morning…”

Don't fall asleep under a hair dryer at the salon - not just because of this strange Sunshine State law, but because we also can't imagine it being very comfortable to fall asleep like that.

3. All doors must open outward on public buildings.

This would save us from the embarrassment of pushing when we should be pulling...

4. Sexual relations with a porcupine.

I think the ouch may even outweigh the eww with these weird laws.

5. Showering naked.

Really? Guilty.

6. Parachuting on Sundays (if you’re an unmarried woman).

Ladies, just wait until Monday (unless you're a married woman). This strange law affects unmarried women.

7. No strapless gowns for men.

Drag shows will never be the same.

8. Elephant fines.

You can't "park" an elephant on the street without getting a ticket. Oh, Ringling!

9. Strolling or ambling happily.

Wipe that smile off your face; stroll or amble with anger.

10. No farting in a public place after 6pm.

Get it out early, otherwise watch what you eat.

11. No monkeying around.

Imitating zoo animal behavior can put you behind a similar cage.

12. No topless dancers performing topless dances. 

Seems to defeat the purpose.

13. Selling oranges on the street in Miami

If you're hoping to sell oranges on the streetside in Miami lemonade stand-style, think again.

Need a lawyer in Hernando County?

At Lowman Law Firm, we know how to have a laugh over weird laws in Florida. But we do take the law seriously and are here to represent our community in need.

If you’ve been involved in any situation that feels overwhelming and you’d like to speak with someone, give us a call anytime. We are here for you and proudly service the Hernando County area, including Tampa, Spring Hill, Dade City, Crystal River, and Brooksville.